Starting Now
This time of year is one of new beginnings. It allows for fresh starts. It offers the hope of change or possibility.
But I’ve recently realized that there is too little time to change a life in year-by-year increments. Resolutions are fine when it comes to the little things, but they’re ultimately too small for a person who truly wants to feel alive, starting now. And something so small is easily broken; it doesn’t allow for any amount of failure. When we break, we give up.
There are things about my life that I need to change — not just for this month or this year, but for the rest of my time here. I need something bigger than resolutions. I’m ready for major paradigm shifts, to do better for myself and others, and that means that I’m prepared to fail, over and over and over again. But I’m also ready to get back up and keep trying. And all of it starts today.
I’m ready to be healthier. I want my happiness to start from within. I will be kinder to myself and gentler with others. I will believe in the goodness of humankind, and I’ll believe in my own. I will stop wasting my time on lies, negativity, and harmful behaviors. I’m ready to live a beautiful life.
Here’s how…..
- There are moments, and hours, and sometimes even entire seasons of life when all we can do is get through. So sometimes, I will just get through. Because if I can get through, everything else will have its time later. And that’s okay. Starting today.
- There’s a cruel voice that tells me my worth is tethered to a certain measure of success or to specific outcomes. Starting today, I will ignore it. My value in this world looks more like raindrops. I do my best to sprinkle goodness everywhere I go, and in some places, I cause a downpour.
- It’s too easy to lose hope because of the number on the scale, the puff in my face, the grays in my hair. It’s too easy to lose hope because I haven’t accomplished my newest goal. But I will stop putting my hope in things that blow with the wind. Starting today, I will eat to nourish myself. I’ll indulge in favorite things sometimes, and I’ll savor every bite. I’ll move my body to feel well, to feel energized, to feel ready to tackle the day with enthusiasm. I promise myself that I will feel at home in my own skin and in my own life; I promise myself that weight and grays and goals will not define me. I am so much more.
- Every day, I hear the lie that I’m wasting time unless I’m constantly productive. But I know that to be still and nourish my spirit is time well spent. Playing with my kids is time well spent. Silly-dancing with my husband in the kitchen is time well spent. Laughing with my friends is time well spent. In fact, maybe bringing peace and joy to the hearts in my household is the best way to spend my time. So, starting today, I will rebuke the lie.
- I’m hard on myself. Like, really, really hard on myself. There are so many things I need to do better. But I also know that I operate best when I’m given some grace. Starting now, I’ll honor the God who gives me an immeasurable amount of grace, by giving myself just a little bit, too. And by heaping grace onto others. Just watch where that will take me.
- Hurtful — even deeply damaging — words and behaviors can be disguised as a lot of things. Sometimes they’re dressed as religion. Sometimes they’re called politics. Sometimes they even look like love. But I deserve for my heart to be treated with gentle hands. So do you. So does everyone else in the world. It’s my responsibility to surround myself with people who insist on being kind…not only to me, but to others. Starting now.
- This life is painfully brief, and there are no second chances. I’m tired of living a life that’s based on fear — fear of failure, fear of judgment, fear of loss, fear of embarrassment, fear of heartache. Starting today, I vow that I will make decisions based on possibility. I will live a life that’s colorful and open and bursting with exuberance and love. I vow that I will pursue joy relentlessly.
And when I fail, I promise that I will get back up and try again. As many times as it takes. With a passion and a grit that you’ve never seen from me before.
Starting now.
